A very lovely weekend was had by us and our little boy. He had his sixth birthday party, a small and intimate affair with just a few select friends and family that we know he plays particularly well with.
It started out well with him listening to our instructions about presents not to be opened as soon as people came in. He was to stack them all on the side board after thanking his guests as he welcomed them in. He did it flawlessly! So cute.
It was the very first birthday party I have been to for a child between the ages of one and 10 years old where there were no fights or screaming tantrums had by anyone! Just lovely!
While children’s parties are still stressful events in some points for the adults, this one was actually quite calm and enjoyable. We brought out the slip’n’ slide which a favourite Aunt had bought as a present and all the kids had a slippery sliding, watery time. Who would have thought just how many laughs and squeals of delight those old things could still bring out in little children! No one was hurt, and even the youngest and most timid of children had at least one go and didn’t hate it. I was very impressed at how well the kids all lined up and waited for their turn. Even our son after his Ritalin had worn off, would run away from the line and up and down the side of the slide while others were sliding, but always got back into line and had is turn without pushing anyone else away from their turn.
At the end of the day, we were rewarded beyond anything as we put a tired boy into the bath and he turned to us and said,
“Thank you for a lovely party day Mummy and Daddy. I really had such a good time!”
Awww. The differences in him since we went on that week at his school and learnt all these new techniques and really started to understand what is happening behind the behaviour just makes it all worthwhile.
He is officially behind academically now, which is a shame for such a bright little lad, but we found out today that the special school would like to keep him there for the rest of this term until the end of the year, and then come back next year and start the integration period back to main stream next year as he isn’t quite ready yet. But they are seeing so many improvements that they have high hopes for him. It’s so interesting though that the things we really needed to change was us, not him. Well…. that’s not strictly true I guess. In large part it’s true, but the medication does do a great deal for keeping him still and focused and allowing the adults a chance to improve themselves because we aren’t in ‘fire fighting mode’ continually anymore.
Today he went to little ninjas and passed his grading to earn his next belt. He was very proud of himself as we were proud of him. What a little star he’s been this weekend and so far this week too. Not perfect of course. We still have some funny struggles and some difficult ones to go through, but we have an interesting and different kind of child. Now however, we are supporting him properly as often as we can, and that will make it easier for his differences to shine rather than sink him.
When they say there is no manual for parenting, they are wrong. There is one. You just have to have screwed up rather badly somewhere along the line and have a kid who lets you and everyone else know it before they let you have the manual!
Perhaps I’ll write one….. but I must finish my fantasy novel first. 😉